I have deleted my FriendFeed account. I’ve told myself that there was no reason I could ever do that—nothing anything could say or do that would so piss me off that I thought I would be better off without that circle of friends. And friends we are: we’ve consoled each other over the deaths of our mutual friends. We’ve shared births and weddings and new jobs and losing jobs and strange holidays that we’ve never heard of before. And yet, in spite of that, there are people there who take absolute joy in being a troll: in finding something personal that they can attack and ridicule. They like the attention, I suppose.
FriendFeed was like a comfortable pub. I could show up any time of the day or night and find people that I liked, who liked me, and who would have something interesting to discuss. Imagine visiting that pub for years, growing comfortable, watching new people come and old ones die or merely fade away. Imagine showing up one day to find that every person you knew had decided to humiliate you by attacking the things you hold most dear—your home. Imagine hearing them carry on and on about how awful a place it is, how stupid the people are there, and how they don’t really understand it, but they really hate that place.
Would you come back? Is that the sort of place where you want to find your friends? Guess what, my “friends?” I shop at Wal-mart. My family shops at Wal-mart. They mostly vote Republican. They worship Jesus Christ and don’t fully understand foreign cultures, though they’re open and friendly and loving, especially once you get to know them. They like country music and bass fishing and they don’t like pretentious assholes from other states telling them how they should spend their money. They read Reader’s Digest and Shakespeare and ancient Greek. Some of them drive Priuses and others drive big, gas-hogging SUVs because that’s what they need to pull their boat or simply to protect their loved ones in a crash.
I’m torn between two worlds, having grown up in the deepest parts of east Texas, and living now in Silicon Valley. I’ve also lived in Ascot, England, and worked in Wuppertal, Germany. Fundamentally, “my people” are not all that different than those of you who like to poke fun at them. One of the few differences is that they teach their children manners. When I visit Texas, the children there, with few exceptions, say “Yes, Sir,” and “No, Sir,” and “Hello, Mr. Campbell.” In pretentious, sophisticated, highly-educated Silicon Valley, the sixth-graders that my wife teaches call her “Stupid,” “Dumbo,” and a “Crack Whore.” When asked to remove their hoods in class, they say, “Why don’t you make me?” It’s obvious when those manners carry over into their online lives.
I’m tired of the pretense. I’m tired of the holier-than-thou attitudes, the disrespectful, hateful “conversations.” I’m tired of trying to walk a middle group, trying to get people to see each other’s points of view. I’m just tired.
I don’t want to cut all ties with my friends. I want to hear about Akiva & Rochelle’s next baby; I want to find out what’s going to happen with Scott and Mary Carmen; I want to hear the next tune from Josh Haley, and I want to see if Marissa makes better decisions than my son, who’s also a freshman in college. But you’ll forgive me, I hope, if I don’t hang out there much any more.
Maybe someday I’ll return, but right now it’s not the sort of place I want to be associated with.
Damn, Glen. Sorry to hear it. I was offended by his post as well, but just chocked it up to ignorance and moved on. We know how awesome Texas is. I hope you change your mind and come back some day!
I get it, and this kinda thing is bound to happen. Folks don't understand what could possible make people get up and leave FF because their too busy being inconsiderate and trapped in the small bubble that's their world.
I know where you're coming from and while I can't say I'd do the same, I totally understand the frustration. Hope to see you back soon.
Glen, Sorry to see you leave FF. I enjoyed the many conversations we both participated in and the content that you posted. It's too bad that a couple of people had to ruin the experience for you. Had you tried blocking the offending people prior to deleting your account? I hope you consider returning some day.
damn, dude. come back and just block the ppl who get you hacked on a regular basis. loads of us missing you.
Gah, why can't you have Disqus like a normal person? Anyway, this is Akiva. I'm so pissed right now I can hardly contain my rage. I just want you to know that I understand your position completely. I hope you have my contact information. If not, let me know here and I'll e-mail you our info.
Your friendship I truly value. Others at this point? I am not so certain.
Glen,
This saddens me greatly. I am familiar with the post that caused this, and I can say that this breaks my heart. The persons post was and is not representative of the vast majority, and it makes me sad and angry that one egotistical big-headed prick can cause so much damage. Please feel free to email me (nasm86 AT gmail.com or add google voice 858-412-7663). Mary Carmen and I would love to keep in contact with you, you really were one of the best of friend feed…I'm sorry…
-Scott.
Sorry to see you go, Glen. :/
Damn, Glen…I am sorry to see you go. Your description of your family seems to mirror my own…and in Texas too! I see a bit where you are coming from, but just leave ignorants to their own devices and enjoy the rest of the good things on FF (like the new Rochell & Akiva babby and Scott & Mary Carmen, etc). I hope you reconsider, but do as you must…the good and fun-loving FF'ers will back you up on whatever you do.
Thank you.
Seems like a reasonable response to me.
sorry to hear it glen… find me on facebook? twitter? gmai? leme know.. . keep in touch though, kay?
I'll miss you, Glen. You're a real gem.
I'm so sorry to hear this, Glen. We are diminished by losing you. When or if you feel able to return, I will be the one running out to greet you. In the meantime, I'll miss you, and I'll hold you in my prayers.
Peace and blessings, Sister Heather
Sorry to hear you're leaving Glen. You will be missed. I absolutely believed everyone was joking on that thread, emotion and context doesn't come through well in plaintext
Hey man, you got the stones to say what you think, and i admire you for it. Sorry to see you go on FF but damn, I understand. Basically Akiva stole my thunder with his comment…AGAIN.
You know where to find me. I think. let me know. -Josh
Oh, and you are absolutely right about Texas. The more the trolls go on and on about how much they hate it, the more I am glad I am here and they are not.
This makes me so sad! Your comments always made me laugh and smile. I understand how you feel, but I do hope you reconsider and if not, that you keep in touch.
I understand. Please come back soon.
Sorry to see ya go Glen. I was disappointed by the Texas bashing as well, but what can you do? Maybe deleting your account was the best option. Keep in touch.
Social networks come and go, and so do friends from each network. It sounds harsh, but those connections can always be replaced. I am still up for friend chicken and waffles any time you want. I think you know how to find me.
Glen, I'm really sorry that you left FF. I understand that feeling of being let down by a community when you've made such a huge investment of time and emotion. If you decide to return to FF, I hope we'll connect again.
Be well.
You know what it feels like to possibly be the reason that a person that you admire leaves friendfeed? It feels like crap…that's what. Sorry, Glen, I can only guess that this is really over my post about people voting for GW and not the snarky anti-Texas nonsense post, but I'm sorry nonetheless. Please come back.
Glen, I've enjoyed your comments and insights. And I, too, hope to see your presence again after you have had time to rest and take stock. Tell your wife, I am sorry. All my family were public school teachers as was I.. once. It is tough these days. My prayers are with you. To paraphrase Benedick in "A Much Ado About Nothing": Serve God, Love your wife, and mend". from a Texas Transplant who considers it her second home. I still see the big bright stars at night all the way north in Unionville.
Glen, I'm so saddened by this. We'll always have Skype, and blog comments and email and Twi—, er, Jaiku. But it's still a grave loss. I respect your taking swift action based on principle, and you detailed it well in your above post.
Ok, so I can't go back to it, because your feed is gone [pang], but you had asked Who's my posse?, who'd be dragging you back to friendfeed if you ever left. I hate it when I'm prophetic (I think a wire got crossed on this one though). I suppose you'll know who the members are in the weeks ahead.
The truth is, my posse won't drag you anywhere. But they will meet you in the desert, build a campfire, play the harmonica and tell tales of our days on the trail hither and yawn. Just give me the GPS coordinates and we'll be there.
Anyway, my 140 characters is up now, the operator is going to drop the call, the levee (where Chevy was took) is almost dry, so I'm heading off to some place serene to think over the day's events, most likely I'll be taking a drive across the bridges of Madison County (hat tip C. Harley).
Your friend,
Me <—(I know what you're think'n: 'Be more specific' – I know right)
PS. If I see a vehicle plated K6GEC, I'll will honk the honking device.
END TRANSMIT
Glen, this saddens me very much so, but I understand why you've left. Hell, I've been feeling like it's time for me to leave as well, there are a few people who are willing to attack what you believe and don't really care anymore. The just want to get they're point across, people who I though were sensible and I still consider them friends, but I honestly don't know if I want to deal with them anymore.
The past week has been like someone set a powder keg under the site and is waiting for it to explode. After reading this, I think I might as well leave also, but I'll be harvesting my data first.
Best of wishes to you and your family, James "Jimminy" Fuller
Glen, I'm so sorry to see you go. I've really enjoyed your posts and your comments. I hope that you'll come back at some point because you will be missed.
Glen – I noticed all of this just last night. What a miss. Hoping you'll be back buddy
I have said some really stupid, mean things on FriendFeed – often knee jerk emotional responses without thinking about whose feelings I might have hurt.
I don't think any of us meant to say anything that would hurt one of us to this extent. To the extent that I hastened your departure, I'm sorry.
I heard about this last night too but it still breaks a piece of my heart this morning. I understand being offended from some of the harsh sentiments shared on FF. That particular post did not affect me, but others have and I have taken breaks, slowed down my participation and considered leaving altogether a few times out of disappointment from many in the community. Today, there is one less great person there.
Glen, I will certainly miss you around FF but I am glad I am connected with you in other networks. 
This makes me sad, and I wasn't even part of that circle of friends you cherished there.
Glen, as far as I'm concerned, the answer will always be The Bridges of Madison County.
I missed the original threads, but I can certainly understand how you feel. I've felt similarly before. But what I really came to say was that I will miss you and I'm really grateful for the time I was able to interact with you.
i would read your posts but I get where you are coming from. Hopefully this blog sticks around. That's the great thing right..there's other ways to keep in touch or contact with someone. Hope you come back though..you had really interesting posts.
I have always appreciated your contributions to the community, Glen. I have been spending less time on FriendFeed only because I have been busy with work related projects. I am sorry to see you go and appreciate the points of your explanation. Your insightful wit and candor will be missed by many including me.
Glen:
Well said. As a fellow Texan with deep roots there, I understand and sympathize with your position.
Take care of yourself and hope to see you around, wherever you may share your thoughts and opinions.
Best to you!
Kurt
Well said Glen. Everybody has their own limit.
I completely missed whatever went on and was really sorry to hear you left FF. I hope the disappointment fades quickly and you remember the good times.
Well said Glen. Everybody has their own limit.